Intolerance

For the hopeful resolutioners...

Another year...

Hello all.

Yesterday was my birthday. 29. 29. Can you believe it? The way I rant...I can't!

I woke up at around 10ish excited to have slept in. I have been waking up with my arms crossed in front of my face as if I was a kid asleep in class. I strolled out of bed, drank some water, played online then waited impatiently while my mother made me Mexican food. Delightful! I then opened presents from my sister who bought me.

Hopefully I will be as lovely as Lauren Conrad and as perfect as Mindy Kaling this 2014.

Other gifts include from mi madre and close friends;

This was a great birthday. I spent time with family and friends. I also had carbs which as you know very well..I love! I almost did not celebrate though and I feel immense guilt for admitting this but part of me wishes I had not. Not because I had a bad time...no no but I also just disliked this year so much and felt I had nothing really to show for it that..why celebrate? But ultimately I made the decision to celebrate because 1. I like presents, 2. I like the people in my life so why wouldn't I want to celebrate an awful year gone by that will hopefully not reoccur in 2014.

Most people would assume 2012 was a bad year for me. It wasn't I had some great moments in 2012. I got my tattoo I had wanted for years, Tudor Rose! I traveled to San Francisco and I got out of a long dead end relationship. Sounds like good things to me! 2013 has been nothing but failures and dead ends. I felt stuck. Constantly stuck. I had to relearn how to be single again but unlike in the past how I felt so much better being single than attached and if that is so will I ever be okay in a relationship again. This year asked more questions than answered. Though I still feel a bit in the mud I feel more relieved than I have been in the past.

29. Its not old but its not exactly young. I did feel like taking a nap in the afternoon.

In other news since this is techincally a health/food blog. I took photos with three friends. God. This is why I did not want a party. PHOTOS! I look like an obese Asian. Also, the curling iron I got hates my hair which really depresses me. But next year I must look at this photo. Daily. When I think about giving up just look. When I think I'd rather eat and mourn, than rise and work out. When I think I don't want to date but really I do. When I think I'm not so bad looking but could look so much better. When I ignore my constant acne and anxiously want to eat sugar. Just  look. Just look at this photo. Not the person you want to be. Not the person you wanted to celebrate. FYI I am the very fat one on the right.

I can't and will not celebrate my 30th looking like this.

Some Enchanted Evening....

Good stuff.

New years resolution: Drink more tea. I received two recommendations for a hipster tea shop right across from the parking garage I leave my car in during work. I was helped by a hipster gentleman with an afro who told me to stop sleeping on my stomach as it was bad for me. Dude I get it. I am like a walking disease but don't tell any future insurance providers.

I'll have to go back next payday as I would have bought more but buh...the holidays and rent aka student loan bill.

Enchanted Evening included lavender, mint, rose hips and chamomile. I think cinnamon as well.

Tea Press from Bodum. Tea cups from the thrift store.

Sleep to Dream

Story of MY life!
I'm writing you as a sleep deprived lady. Since well...Thanksgiving yeah...a week ago I have had trouble sleeping. I have a problem of plenty. The first being my neck is too short to support my huge head and my stomach sleeper pillows are suffering the consequences. Secondly, to support my neck I wrap my arms under the pillow. This does help but one week prior I woke up to a painfully numb hand. Think tiny knives being placed all over my palm and fingers and that's what I felt. Thirdly...oh yeah it keeps going I have nightly anxiety. I freak out about everything, how fat I am, how I wish I looked like a lady worthy of the Governor when I sleep, The Governor.......

He is so hot....

Continued How poor I am, how ill traveled I am, how my family struggles EVERYTHING!!!!! I used to stay awake at night because I couldn't imagine sleeping in a world so fucked up that animals live in puppy mills and factory farms. God damn all puppy mill people to HELL!Then it continues. I think about the ill effects this is having on my body. I am irritable at work, I don't want to work out (then the ass hole voice in my head is like if you don't sleep your work out will be ineffective and the same voice is telling me how fat I am and how I won't look like a woman unless I go to the gym) FUUUUUUCCCCKKKK YOUUUUU. Another personal reason for me worrying about my recent sleep disturbances. A mind at rest can not properly function. Sleep disorder is linked to Alzheimer s. A gene in which I do carry and am likely to get if I do not care for myself. And early onset Alzheimer's is becoming more prevalent in our society. This concerns me more than weight loss. I've seen what Alzheimer's does and I hope I do not have to go through that, let alone if I have children that they need to witness that.

Anyway I've been really bad. I've resorted to buying over the counter everything. I am keeping Zzquill and Advil PM in business. Its gotten to the point where I am in mass pain because I am not sleeping. My head feels it, my chest, my legs, my stomach everything. Since food not only affects your waistline and your new found celibacy I've decided to write about my struggle.

 

I've bought some cheap Chamomile tea but I need to visit a tea shop (not Teavana) and invest in a great blend. I regret not stocking up while I was in Chinatown a year ago, but I had I gone there first I wouldn't have had money for the rest of the vacation. I have also promised myself only 10-15 min of internet before bedtime and then it must be turned off. No exceptions not even Pandora. Then I start to read. Read till I feel sleepy and then sleep. This sorta worked last night. My body felt tired. I read a bit then tried to sleep. I think it took me longer than I would have liked to fall asleep but I did eventually. 

Here are some other tips that I will be trying and report back to on them.The last one is for me and anyone who is trying to switch to AM work outs. I prefer the evenings to work out but I really really really need to switch to the am. Especially in winter I hate going out in the dark cold night. The pro of nighttime work outs is less people and less annoying trainers. But going in the morning does get it out of the way and gives me my free time to go home and watch ten hours of What not to Wear. Pleasant Dreams everyone.

Veggies of the Snow

I hate vegetables. Mostly because I wasn't raised with them and secondly because every time I have a plate of greens before me I am like FUCK I'm on a diet aren't I? Some people think I'm crazy for my hate. I think so too. Well... a little. If you aren't raised on specific foods than adapting them into your adult life will be a harder transition. My advice to parents...make your kids eat their greens!

In season vegetables;

Sweet Potatoes:

Winter Squash:

Kale: An overrated veggie in my opinion but all the rage for health nuts.

Artichokes: These are yum and even better thrown over pizza or pasta. ( I know forever celibate.)

Celary, carrots and cauliflower:

Brussel sprouts, cabbage, and broccoli:

Leeks and Onions:

Potatoes and Radishes: Delish. Fuck paleo and other potato haters.

Fruits of the Snow

Hi everyone and Happy Thanksgiving ! I've read to make this blog more successful aside from having my own personal success I need to update it at least 2 to 3 times a week. So here I am lovelies. I really want to make an effort to eat fruits and veggies in season. Its not just good for your body but it is also better for your planet. If you are like me and live in perpetual cold rain land or in the middle of no where your local varieties might well...not exist. The second best thing to do if you can not shop local or are not lucky enough to have your own green house is to shop in season. Here are some yummy fruit options this winter.


CLEMENTINES are small, sweet orange available from December through the winter.

GRAPEFRUIT from California, Texas, Florida, and Arizona comes into season in January and stays sweet and juicy into early summer.

KIWIS grow on vines and are harvested winter through springing warmer and temperate areas.

LEMONS AND MEYER LEMONS tend to be at their best winter and spring.

MANDARINS are sweet and juicy in winter.

ORANGES add sunny brightness to winter eating.

PEARS have a season that runs from mid-summer well into winter, depending on the variety and region.

PERSIMMONS are available for a short window in the fall and early winter - look for bright, heavy-feeling fruits.

SATSUMAS have loose skins and super-sweet tangerine flavor.

TANGERINES are oranges' sweeter, more honeyed cousins. As with all citrus fruit, look for specimens that feel heavy for their size.

Pretty much any citrus treats are in season this winter. Oh I did forget to add pomegranates! These guys are great in salads, yogurts(coconut) and eaten with dark chocolate.

There and Back Again

Its been a while blog. I haven't written in you in um...over a month. Remember I said, its not you its me after spewing out my heart and soul I left you high and dry. Sorry. But you know as well as I have that this last year has really sucked. Its been uneventful and when events have occurred they've been bad ones. It seemed to be never ending. First world problems aside, yes I know starving children, prostitutes, and Renee Zellwingers face job...it could be worse. I do recognize that.  But for me as you know...I expected so much more.

Last you heard from me I did try the liver cleanse detox. Aside from constant hunger, which seriously I don't get how people lose weight without being anorexics. I still have not figured this out. And if someone says, try protein I will hit you. Virtually hit you or physically hit you whatever is quickest. Safe to say the diet didn't work out as I; 1. wasn't eating enough. 2. was ready to eat my fist 3. I hated everything because I was so hungry. I caved and I binged. I'm pretty sure it was a taco bell binge, the only place I have had food poisoning from. And I kept eating there. Not just because I fancy tacos, but probably because I was so upset at myself for giving up that I prayed the tacos would make me sick again. Catholic punishment minus the fact that I don't consider myself a catholic or own a whip or hair vest.

Long story short. That's when I decided to take a break from the blog. I don't know how many people read this. Maybe a handful, maybe fifty, maybe none but I didn't want to put on a charade. I gave up. Again. I didn't need to face that just yet. I ran from it.

You may be asking yourself this as you read; Does this bitch even want to lose weight? Why is she making it so hard? Taco bell is not real food or I fucking love taco bell bring back the bell beefer! The answer is yes I want to lose weight. I have wanted to so badly. It truly does make me feel better when I am smaller both physically and mentally. I am pretty sure I have Diabetes 5 now! "Why is she making it so hard?" I don't fucking know maybe because I have had everyone from a mother of three who thinks she knows the world, to an uptight male paleo blogger who only dates Asians and is 100 pounds, to girls who just decided to lose weight and it came so naturally to them try to tell me to just give up starch and just work out and everything will be okay. I am here to tell you that cutting out a food group.... DOESN'T MAKE EVERYTHING OKAY! I already suffer from social and personal anxiety even sometimes but rarely resulting in anxiety attacks. When I am told I can't have something or am faced with the burden of hunger I lash out and cave.

I am going to cut to the chase as I am pretty tired and I know you want me to cut to the chase. This year...if it has offered anything has been a year of reflection. What do I want? What do I absolutely not want? I think I've figured it out mostly. What I want more than anything is to be healthy. I want to live the life I know I should be living. I am the captain of my soul. I also want a job where i feel valued and can take care of myself. I want to travel Europe, I want to love again, I want to have sex again (yes I went there), I want to start living like a woman on the verge of her 30s and not like that scared 19 year old I was 10 years ago. I don't want to waste my time with people that don't respect me. I don't want relationships with little or no value and I don't want to settle. 

 A good friend told me in regards to certain people in relationships , "We all get the person we deserve. They are a reflection of ourselves in one way or another. Whether we accept it or not! We only get what we think we can have. " I think about this in regards to my ex and his current relationship. And it is not a good thing,  And I think about it in regards to what we had. I was settling. There was love but...he was going one way and I was going another.

I know I only have five weeks left of this year. Well six if you count half a week as one....which no one does okay...5 and a half weeks. But I don't want to let this year have been a total waste. My birthdays next month. 29...fuck me right? Not sure if I'll do a whole lot but a martini and a piece of cake sounds good. And then there is Thanksgiving which is more awesome than Christmas because you get to eat like a pig without buying people presents. 

Aside from the holidays I've made a vow to myself. Rather than wait for the new year because by the time the new year rolls around and I have been dormant I'll have gained holiday weight. No bueno. My vow is I will start a good work out routine now. Cardio 3-4 times a week, one day strength (will build up to two by week three but I am a MUTANT and gain muscle like a man minus the sweet fat loss) and one to two days of pilates/yoga. That seems like a lot right? Well if you plan it accordingly its really just 5-6 times a week gym time which is what I should be doing to lose weight. 

As far as my diet goes...well the holidays are coming. I won't make promises like no mashed potatoes or pie like some sick fuck would but I will say I'll try to make healthier decisions daily. Like nix the soda for water, eat veggies at night instead of chips, you know gluten does you no good and your ass hates dairy so maybe limit to one every other day till you the new year when you will try to go sans dairy and gluten. 

I know I won't lose mass weight as I planned. But it will get me ready for the new year to start doing some real kick ass work outs and to make eating right an easier transition. I don't vow to do paleo, vegan or anything too much of a commitment but I am trying to listen to my body and sadly I think it is outgrowing fried foods, gluten and dairy and ...sniffle sniffle....refined sugar. 

 

As my image says; "one step: choosing a goal and sticking to it. Changes everything."

My goal is 125. I won't say what I weigh now but its a lot more than 125. I don't know how long it will take. But that is who I am meant to be. 

Goal number two: Get a job where you can take care of yourself, buy more decent organic groceries and save and pay off debt. Goal one and Goal two should actually be fused into one super goal. MUST ACCOMPLISH.

More than words

More yummy recipes (not my own!)

http://ohmyveggies.com/recipe-sweet-potato-pizza-with-kale-and-caramelized-onions/

http://www.eatingbirdfood.com/2012/09/healthy-pizza-with-a-cauliflower-crust/

Wowza- not my recipe but I have to make!

Ingredients: 

1.5 cups raw walnuts, divided

1.5 cups unsalted almonds, divided

2 cups Medjool dates, pitted and roughly chopped

3/4 cup cocoa powder or raw cacao powder

1/4 cup coconut shavings 

1/4 cup coconut oil

1 teaspoon vanilla 

pinch of sea salt

1/2 cup vegan chocolate chips

Directions: 

Place 1 cup walnuts and 1 cup almonds in food process and ground until they are a fine consistency. Add cocoa powder, coconut shavings, coconut oil, vanilla, and sea salt. Pulse to combine and then transfer to bowl and set aside. Add chop dates into food processor and process until small bits remain. Transfer to a bowl and set aside. Add cocoa mixture back into food processor and while processing add date pieces into mixture. Process until a doughy, sticky consistency is achieved. It may look like cake crumbs, but it should hold together when pressed. Place brownie mixture in a parchment lined cake pan and add remaining 1/2 cup roughly chopped almonds. Mix with hands until well-combined, then press dough until it is flat and firm. Garnish with remaining 1/2 cup walnuts. Melt vegan chocolate chips in the microwave for 4 minutes, making sure to stir with a wooden spoon every 20 seconds (add a few drops of coconut oil if melted chocolate is too thick). Drizzle melted chocolate over walnuts and brownies. Refrigerate or freeze for at least an hour before cutting. 

granola from a skinny girl

Ingredients:

3 cups gluten-free rolled oats

1 cup raw pumpkin seeds

1 cup raw sunflower seeds

1 cup coconut shavings

1 1/4 cup raw almonds

1/4 dried cranberries (or other dried fruit)

1/4 teaspoon salt

1/2 tablespoon ground cinnamon

1/4 teaspoon nutmeg

1/4 cup coconut oil

1/2 cup raw honey

2 teaspoons vanilla extract

Directions:

Preheat oven to 340 degrees. Place oats, pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds, coconut, almonds, salt, cinnamon, and nutmeg in a large bowl. In a saucepan over medium low heat, warm coconut oil, honey and vanilla and pour over dry ingredients. Mix until well combined. Spread granola mixture evenly on a baking sheet. Transfer to oven and bake, tossing every 10 minutes, until granola is deep golden brown. Bake for about 25 minutes. Add dried fruit around the last 5 minutes of baking time. Allow granola to cool for at least one hour before eating. Store in an airtight container and enjoy with some almond milk or greek yogurt.

Also, I know you guys having been asking for a fitness post and I pinky promise I'm working on it!

 

Karlas closet.com 

I just gotta say

I had to unfollow a lot of paleo pinners on pinterest. Why you ask?

Because they are more annoying than vegans.

Bacon is NOT orgasmic. I love pigs and try to stay as far away from pork as I can but my weakness is sausage. I don't buy sausage though because of my love of pigs and if I do I try applegate chicken sausage or will make a quest to Whole Foods. But every idiotic paleo post or anti vegan post is like OMG BACON FUCK ME BACON. CALM DOWN! Bacon ain't gonna fuck you so relax! Its not that good.

And they post stupid shit like;

"Bread is not real food, When you eat bread Ryan Gosling cries or Health food tastes better than junk food."

In general I do agree with the last statement. Nectarines and fresh produce tastes better than oh I don't know... BACON! But when paleo people say this they mean all starch. This is not true. Spaghetti and bread and parmesan cheese tastes better than zuchinni noodles pretending to be spaghetti like some imposter of joy. I love you zucchini but you are no spaghetti. I am probably very gluten intolerant but I'll be the first to say the ONLY substitute that comes close to being as good as spaghetti is brown rice spaghetti. A STARCH!

There I know I said I was temporarily breaking up with you blog but I just had to vent.

Paleo enthusiasts are worse than vegans. At least I get the vegan movement. I don't believe the world should follow a vegan diet based on certain peoples medical allowance's ( gluten and dairy are probably poison to me so I need some meat in my diet always) but the world should rid itself of factory farms entirely and go back to a much different method of slaughter. Perhaps our economy would really suffer from this but our health as a nation is already suffering due to the high convenience of fast food.

So in conclusion no more following paleo blogs. I believe in their mission of clean eating but I don't agree with their way being the only way. When I follow a paleo plan my grocery bill sky rockets and I am left with an acidic stomach due to high meat consumption, high fiber in produce and no starch to soak the acidity.  And vegans... I respect vegans a lot but PETA can suck an egg.

Dear blog

I may be taking a bit of a sabbatical from you. Its not you, its me.

I can't really explain but I promise I will return again soon.

I've just been feeling guilty, hungry, disappointed, poor, insanely sexually frustrated and upset in life.

If there are asexual pills out there please send them my way. I can't sign up for another dating site and then delete that profile the next day because I am 1, too fat to date and 2, not willing to date any loser who fancies me and that's all I seem to be attracting. I don't want to deny myself dating again because in other aspects of my self I feel I am ready but I am just so damned insecure. Thus this continues the, guilty, hungry, disappointed, dieting cycle that's been this past year.

If I had asexual pills then maybe I could accomplish tasks in life, like getting in shape, finding a better job and moving out of my parents home......oh and paying off my student debt.

I will be back blog. Maybe tomorrow, maybe two tomorrows from now, a week or two. I will be back and  in my absence I will fill you with all the woes, misadventures and adventures of my life.

Maybe when I return I will be 20lbs lighter, with a cool boyfriend and with a cooler job.

Maybe not.

Maybe you'll just have me.

Tori.

Update

Good morning (afternoon) world!

Here is another update on my cleanse adventure.

Day 1: I woke up craving donuts. Yeah. And then i realized today was detox day 1.

On liver cleanse you are suppose to start each morning drinking a ton of water followed by an 8oz  vegetable juice. I am not blessed with a fabulous juicer so I bought a juice from the health food store. It looks like what comes out of a vegan after a colonic. I was repulsed by its murky muddy green appearance. Surprise though it tastes better than it looks. Thanks to the mango and apple in it!

Breakfast was gluten free steel cut oats with strawberries and a little bit of agave and crushed pecans. Delicious but I needed a bit more with it as I was still pretty hungry.









I can't remember what I had for lunch...oh yeah I made a pot of kale and lentil soup. My sister likes this soup I don't know if I love lentils as much as a vegetarian or vegan should. I added Siracha to the soup and the spice made it tolerable. I paired it with a butternut squash salad. Sorry I don't have a photo for either as i was hungry and devoured it all before I could take one.

Is anyone else as sexy as me when they work out and sweat beneath their boobs. FTW!

Dinner was good. Quinoa with steamed asparagus (a little too steamed) and salmon patties brushed with pesto. I devoured it all instantly and ate two patties because extra protein is better than extra carbs. I did manage to take a picture for you all.

You can purchase salmon patties at costco or I suppose anywhere really. These came from costco. Will probably make this meal tonight when I get home.

Something that I HAVE to remember if I want to be successful is to eat enough calories. I ate a sweet potato day 2 because I had a ravenous salt craving. So i sprinkled a little bit of salt and added vegan butter. It was good but sweet potatoes are tricky to microwave but thanks to pinterest I found a recipe to crock pot them so I can now cook a bunch and grab to go. And yesterday I was so hungry my parents left a costco rotisserie chicken out and I ate half of the breast. This isn't awful of me. Chicken is a meat I can eat (probably not costco but whatevs) and sweet potatoes are allowed on both liver cleanse, paleo and ask any womens health magazine. However had those foods not been around I could have been in a heap of trouble as my home is usually stocked with french bread loafs and enriched grain pasta.

 Reducing your calories will allow anyone to lose weight however you need to eat an adequate amount so your blood sugar doesn't go out of control. And no one wants to be around you when you are hangry as I kind of have been. This will probably be the #1 challenge during this period.

Gluten Free & Dairy Free pizza

Hello everyone in the blogger world. Today is day 4 of the gluten and dairy cleanse also known as modified Liver Cleanse. Again I say modified because on Liver Cleanse you can eat grains but because I am undoubtedly intolerant I have to cut them out. I'm doing this for you liver so you better like it.

So far so...so-so. The problem I face and I know others face as well is when you cut out food groups from your diet you are kind of at a standstill. Your body wants to eat a yummy pasta dish for lunch but has to eat a salad. Your body also wants to grab some cheese or grab a burrito... but you can't have grains or cheese so....whats a girl to eat? I made the mistake of not bringing food to work on day 2. We have a hipster cafe down the street that does gluten free and has some vegan sandwiches so I figured I'd be fine. NOPE! I walked down pacific avenue taunted by the aroma of both the new frozen yogurt shop and the hot dog vender. I don't care if it is December the 1st and snowing...I'll eat fro yo again!

I settled on sushi across the street. i know I shouldn't be dining out but its a legit sushi joint. I won't down myself for that. My meal included fish, avocado, cucumber and nori sans wheat induced soy sauce. ALL good things for your body, good fat and good veggies.

Last night I really wanted pizza but I needed to abide by the liver cleanse rules of no dairy of course. I purchased Daiya cheese from Marlenes (the intolerant hippie grocery store) and made the crust from the book Primal Cravings- a primal cookbook.

 My dairy free horde from Marlenes. That Almond Dream yogurt... I blogged about it before...it is fantastic. Coconut is always sold out but was there yesterday. I bought the last two. And I know soy haters...bla bla bla. Well.. liver cleanse says it is okay and to me it is most similar in texture to milk and has less sugars than sweetened almond milk.

My gluten and dairy free creation! I would have added veggies but I chopped them up and made a salad instead. Will be more creative with toppings in the future. I would have added pepperoni but alas, this diet prohibits pepperoni and all red meat. I can have chicken and fish and what kind of sick bastard likes anchovies on their pizza?






Pizza Crust

1 cup of tapioca flour
1/4 cup of potato flour
1/3 cup of water
1 teaspoon of powdered gelatin (this can be tricky to find but try the bulk food section or baking aisle.)
 1 egg
1/4 cup of sunflower oil or olive oil (I used olive)

salt to taste, but i skipped that.

1. preheat oven to 400 F. Grease baking sheet with oil of choice ( I dabbed a napkin with olive oil.)
2.) In a large bowl, whisk together tapioca and potato flour.
3.) In another bowl, sprinkle gelatin over 1/3 cup of water. Add egg and oil and whisk to combine.
4.) Whisk the wet ingredients with dry and knead until combined.
5.) Use your hands to press the dough out onto baking sheet.
6.) Prebake the dough until it is crispy and golden brown. About 16 to 20 minutes. Remove from the oven and loosen crust from the pan with spatula.

It does not add this in the directions but I removed my crust at about 16 minutes to add the Daiya cheese and sauce. After you add the toppings it only needs a few minutes to bake so long as your toppings are precooked if you desire adding meat. I also sprinkled a little bit of oregano and basil on top of the Daiya prior to cooking.

I preferred this crust over the crust I made from wheat belly. Wheat Belly was good but did not have the pizza taste or feel. I kid you not when I say it tasted like a pizza nut loaf that some intolerant hippie concocted. As for the Daiya cheese....omg so good. Gooey and hearty like cheese is suppose to taste like. Good texture and taste as well. Even my mother who love cheese and all things dairy (ice cream is lord) thought it was good.

 http://foodwoesandhoes.blogspot.com/2013/08/gluten-free-pizza-crust.html

Unlike the nut loaf this crust stayed together. The end of the crust was nice and crispy similar to a thin crust pizza. This will probably be my go to pizza. If you want a more textured crust and can afford the elitist almond flour and just want a more paleo crust then go with the nut pizza crust. Its different but it is good. 

Once more with feeling

Oh my glob. I have been eating like a monster the past couple of days. Pre- cleanse I was like fries, yes! Spaghetti with lots of parmesan yes! Monster burger, yes! Starbucks dairy crack drink YES!

I have to keep telling myself that when I am missing these foods that I am switching something good for something better. That something better being a better body, better mood, better internal organs and over all better me.

Liver Cleanse is actually a lot more easy going than say paleo or even low glycemic index. I will try to abide by the rules of said low glycemic and maybe a teeny bit of paleo. Only in the sense that though Liver Cleanse allows gluten that I will not be partaking in any. The author stated, "if you think you might be allergic try cutting it out." And the 8 weeks will really judge how my body functions without it. I already know after my two weeks sans it that it probably does not like it.

Wish me luck. No Dairy, No Gluten, mostly organic (what I can afford!) and most importantly no processed foods and no soda. And week 3,4,5,6 are going to be mostly vegan. egg whites and fish okay but fish is expensive especially wild caught so I will probably mostly be vegan. Vegan and gluten free is going to be TOUGH. The only gluten free vegan I know is a bitch. I may not have friends after this.

With the whole Barilla creator claiming he hates the gays and that a woman's place is in the kitchen... this should keep me away from the pasta aisle. I did buy some brown rice pasta though for those days where I am seriously missing Italian food so much that I am about to throw out a message in a bottle into a stormy sea.

I told my sister soda will actually be harder to give up than dairy or gluten and she said, "because soda is designed to keep you hooked." YUP just imagine some dick chemist in a lab creating soda to chastise you and keep you addicted! Perrier Pink Grapefruit is actually a good sub for soda when you just cant beat the craving. Its fizzy, good and hydrating. Zero calories, zero aspartame, just water with a little flavor. :)

My few random readers I will keep you up to date. I'll write an entry tomorrow or Wednesday discussing my first day.

Tomorrows meals include, veggie juice, gluten free steel cut oats with berries and butternut squash salad with lentil soup.

  

 Sir Winston REALLY wanted my last frappuchino

 This fucker. Vanilla Bean Frappe. I haven't had one of these since high school. I loved them. Lord knows how much sugar is in this. I had my first sip as my sayanora to dairy. OMG pure vanilla. Delicious. I'll miss thee and I promise I will not order 9 after the cleanse.

 

The above photos are from my time in Leavenworth. I would have taken a more attractive photo of my last burger but I was extremely hungry and tired when I ate it. I can assure you it was good. As was the pretzel.

 

The town was so precious. I need to visit Bavaria.