I'm writing you as a sleep deprived lady. Since well...Thanksgiving yeah...a week ago I have had trouble sleeping. I have a problem of plenty. The first being my neck is too short to support my huge head and my stomach sleeper pillows are suffering the consequences. Secondly, to support my neck I wrap my arms under the pillow. This does help but one week prior I woke up to a painfully numb hand. Think tiny knives being placed all over my palm and fingers and that's what I felt. Thirdly...oh yeah it keeps going I have nightly anxiety. I freak out about everything, how fat I am, how I wish I looked like a lady worthy of the Governor when I sleep, The Governor.......
He is so hot....
Continued How poor I am, how ill traveled I am, how my family struggles EVERYTHING!!!!! I used to stay awake at night because I couldn't imagine sleeping in a world so fucked up that animals live in puppy mills and factory farms. God damn all puppy mill people to HELL!Then it continues. I think about the ill effects this is having on my body. I am irritable at work, I don't want to work out (then the ass hole voice in my head is like if you don't sleep your work out will be ineffective and the same voice is telling me how fat I am and how I won't look like a woman unless I go to the gym) FUUUUUUCCCCKKKK YOUUUUU. Another personal reason for me worrying about my recent sleep disturbances. A mind at rest can not properly function. Sleep disorder is linked to Alzheimer s. A gene in which I do carry and am likely to get if I do not care for myself. And early onset Alzheimer's is becoming more prevalent in our society. This concerns me more than weight loss. I've seen what Alzheimer's does and I hope I do not have to go through that, let alone if I have children that they need to witness that.
Anyway I've been really bad. I've resorted to buying over the counter everything. I am keeping Zzquill and Advil PM in business. Its gotten to the point where I am in mass pain because I am not sleeping. My head feels it, my chest, my legs, my stomach everything. Since food not only affects your waistline and your new found celibacy I've decided to write about my struggle.
I've bought some cheap Chamomile tea but I need to visit a tea shop (not Teavana) and invest in a great blend. I regret not stocking up while I was in Chinatown a year ago, but I had I gone there first I wouldn't have had money for the rest of the vacation. I have also promised myself only 10-15 min of internet before bedtime and then it must be turned off. No exceptions not even Pandora. Then I start to read. Read till I feel sleepy and then sleep. This sorta worked last night. My body felt tired. I read a bit then tried to sleep. I think it took me longer than I would have liked to fall asleep but I did eventually.
Here are some other tips that I will be trying and report back to on them.The last one is for me and anyone who is trying to switch to AM work outs. I prefer the evenings to work out but I really really really need to switch to the am. Especially in winter I hate going out in the dark cold night. The pro of nighttime work outs is less people and less annoying trainers. But going in the morning does get it out of the way and gives me my free time to go home and watch ten hours of What not to Wear. Pleasant Dreams everyone.
You won't find me working out in the A.M. I can't get my ass out of bed any earlier than 6:00 A.M.
ReplyDeleteOh gosh, yes. It is the worst. Especially in winter. I used to be really good and get up before classes but that was like years ago!
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