Kale Chickpea Abomination that doesn't fill you up

I have met people who say they get full from eating a salad. When my stomach is moaning like a mummy in heat I tend to ask people what they had for lunch or are going to have. When someone says, "Oh I brought a spinach salad." I kind of look at them for a little bit as if they are going to tell me more. In my mind I am thinking, "Spinach salad with....a half a sandwich, cup of soup....a meatball sub?" I think some people pick up on this. They can read the longing in my eyes. They usually continue with, "It has carrots, onion, cucumber...um....beets...sprouts oh and my homemade salad dre-" STOP okay I get it. Its a salad. And it is suppose to not only do wonders for your colon and waistline but its suppose to be a satisfying meal.

This kale and Chickpea salad wasn't bad. But it wasn't great. It left me wanting that meatball sub I hope everyone is secretly eating for lunch. But I hate being wasteful and I need more vegetables in my life like Donald Trump needs lessons in how to not be a cunt and attract other cunts.

I provide this salad recipe for you all who can't get enough of kale and chickpeas. If I could give you all mine I would. I am still on the quest for the ultimate filling salad. I will let you know when I have found it.

GARLICKY KALE SALAD WITH CRISPY CHICKPEAS

 

From the blog : http://minimalistbaker.com/about/

30 mins

 

SUPER flavorful, 30-minute Kale Salad with a creamy roasted garlic tahini dressing and crispy tandoori roasted chickpeas!

Author: Minimalist Baker

Recipe type: Entree

Cuisine: Vegan, Gluten Free

Serves: 2-3

Ingredients

• 10 ounces (~6 cups) kale, loosely chopped or torn

CHICKPEAS

• 1 15-ounce can chickpeas, rinsed, drained and thoroughly dried
• 1.5 Tbsp olive, avocado or grape seed, oil
• 2.5 - 3 Tbsp tandoori masala spice blend* (see notes for DIY blend)

DRESSING

• 1 head garlic
• 1/4 cup tahini
• 2 Tbsp olive oil + more for roasting garlic
• 2 lemons, juiced (~1/3 cup)
• 1-2 Tbsp maple syrup (or honey if not vegan)
• Pinch each salt + pepper
• Hot water to thin

Instructions

1. Peel apart garlic cloves but leave the skin on. Preheat oven to 375 degrees.
2. Add drained chickpeas to a mixing bowl and toss with oil and seasonings.
3. Add garlic cloves and seasoned chickpeas to a baking sheet. Drizzle garlic with a bit of olive or grape seed oil. Bake for 20-23 minutes, or until the chickpeas are slightly crispy and golden brown and the garlic is fragrant and slightly browned. Remove from oven and set aside.
4. Squeeze garlic out of skins / peel away skins and add to a mixing bowl. Add all remaining dressing ingredients and whisk vigorously to combine, smashing the garlic with the whisk. Taste and adjust seasonings as desired, adding more lemon for brightness and maple syrup for sweetness. Set aside.
5. Add kale to a large mixing bowl. Before adding dressing, add 1 Tbsp each lemon juice and olive oil to the kale and massage with hands to soften the texture and lessen bitterness. Then add as much dressing as desired (some may be leftover) and mix with a spoon.
6. Top with chickpeas and serve. Best when fresh, though leftovers keep in the fridge for up to a few days.

Notes

* I bought my Tandoori Masala Spice blend at Whole Foods (it's the Whole Foods Market brand), but you can easily make your own (see next note). 
*DIY Tandoori Masala Blend: 3 Tbsp cumin, 2 Tbsp garlic powder, 2 Tbsp paprika, 3 tsp ginger, 2 tsp coriander, 2 tsp cardamom. Multiply as needed.

Nutrition Information

Serving size: 1/3 of recipe Calories: 494 Fat: 29g Saturated fat: 4g Carbohydrates: 46g Sugar: 5.8gSodium: 80mg Fiber: 13g Protein: 17g